By Collin Harsin
January 5th, 2023
After taking the leap into copywriting. I finished my first wave of cold emails. I aimed to service video game developers by writing Their “About us” page.
Deciding on this plan of attack wasn’t difficult. I have a passion for the games industry, and seeing that the majority of developers have slapped on “About us” pages(if they had any at all), I figure this wouldn’t be too risky for the developers.
Materials and Methods.
I began with research on cold email best practices.
Two main takeaways:
- Personalize it.
I did this by using the recipient’s name and a mention of the company.
Ex: “Hey Brenda- I had a blast with Back4Blood[the name of the game]”.
- Keep it brief.
I understand writing long cold emails were
- A waste of time
- Smothered any important information.
I aim to keep my emails below 50 words. Though I have some ranging as high as 66.
To gather the emails, I signed up for Hunter.io, a web scrubbing app. For 50$ a month, you could insert a URL and find numerous emails from a company.
While it works sufficiently. I had issues.
- You get emails without job descriptions. You then have to vet which emails are appropriate to message. I don’t need emails from intern #447 but you can’t tell the difference unless you do more research on the names attached.
- Painstakingly long. From multiple hours of data collection, I scrubbed 15 emails. Not a viable sample size to do any copywriting on.
After this round of collections. I decided I would hire someone to collect emails for me.
To do this I went to fiver and spent 23$ on someone.
Here’s my listing:
The list was delivered in 3 days and noticed an error. She didn’t only scrub video game developers, she also included gambling and tech sites.
I made a mental note but wasn’t upset. Because the majority was fine. And for 23$ I wasn’t complaining.
Now to the email itself.
I landed on this after some revisions
This mock-up is:
- 46 words
- Allows for personalization
- Has a simple CTA
I created this format because similar to a lab experiment, I wanted something that had parts that could be separately tweaked. Like variables.
I did stray from this format sometimes. For example, if the game developer didn’t have a strong game catalog, I would sub that out for “I was on your website”. Though I mainly stayed the course.
My plan of attack was 10 emails a day. This, I too, infrequently strayed away from. Due to other commitments at the time.
- 5% response rate.
- 3 answered emails.
- 0 sales.
#1 replied with “unsubscribe” which was very funny because this isn’t an automated list.
#2 declined my services.
#3 is the most interesting.
I began a dialogue with him that seemed to be moving well. He asked for a wireframe and when I sent it, things went downhill.
He kindly poked holes in my process, telling me where I could improve, and gave me kind words of encouragement. But declined my services in the end.
Here’s the email.
After brief feelings of rejection. I was determined to use his words to improve. So after thanking him. I created a warm lead page. One I haven’t been able to use yet. But it’s ready.
At first glance, I noticed these areas for improvement.
- Hook- I may opt to use line #1 in the body instead of the subject. And create a new hook.
- Offer. Make sure to emphasize the benefits of the product/service you’re offering?
- Lead collection. I will try different talent. And supply them with a more detailed description of the leads I want.
While unsatisfied with the results, I am optimistic I can improve all around the board.
What have you learned about cold emailing that could help others?
Let me know below and have a great day.